If you know anything about me, you know that I am a text book extrovert. I thrive off interacting with people. There are pros and cons to every personality. For example: When I was a student, I got in trouble for talking too much at school. My introverted husband, on the other hand, got in trouble for reading too much. As I get older I learn to appreciate the gifts God gave me, but I also discover new challenges that arrive in new seasons of life.
These are 10 problems I face as an extroverted mom.
1. I Want to be Away, but Not Alone.
A few nights ago I was loosing it. I was exhausted after Harris pulled an all nighter. Thankfully, it was a Saturday and Josh was home and ready to take the kids out while I got some rest. He told me his plan of taking the kids to the library and getting a little treat afterwards. A huge wave of lonely-ness washed over me. I didn’t want to be left out! “Can’t we do that together after I take a short rest?”, I asked. “Um. Sure.”, he responded, slightly confused. I jumped in the bed and giggled excitedly. Josh quietly came in to shut the door and turn on white noise. “No! Don’t do that! Leave the door open, please.”
“You want me to leave the door…. open…? But then you will hear us…”
I know. It’s weird. I want to hear them so I don’t feel alone. I mean, I don’t want them near me, just kinda near me. Far, but close!
2. I Sign Up for Everything.
FOMO. Fear Of Missing Out. I have it bad. I agree to come to every playdate ever because, well, what if I miss out on some great conversation? What if I get really connected with a mom?? Or my kids make a new best friend?? What if there is some deep conversation I miss out on because I didn’t go?! Usually I just end up canceling on somebody because I make 100 plans and forget that I have days where the baby is up all night and I can’t function.
3. Getting Bored Easily.
Staying home is the worst for me. I have no one to talk to! I usually just go to the park or SOMEWHERE to have a conversation. Someone. Anyone. Please. Let’s have a conversation! But goodness.. Loading up all those kids in their carseats and taking them all out. I’m stuck between wanting to get out and talk to the clerk at Target and dreading getting the kids and myself ready to be seen in public.
4. Being the Last to Leave.
You know the mom that seems to be completely unaware that her kids are melting down and continues to linger and talk anyway? Guilty.
5. Having Trouble Listening.
I get too excited about relating to you, and I forget to listen. I’m at a playdate when you start talking about how your kid is afraid of dogs. Oh! I can relate to that! “That reminds me of how Ellie is afraid of dogs!”, I interrupt. “Except that one dog named Pete. It’s so funny, she calls him ‘Pete the cat’, even though he is a dog. It’s because of this book series called ‘Pete the Cat’. They are great books! Oh, wait… What were you saying again?”
As if playdates aren’t daunting enough, when I get nervous, I talk more. When I am nervous and there is a pause in the conversation, I overtake the entire conversation because I’M AFRAID OF SILENCE. Making mom friends can be hard, especially when you see their eyes glaze over and you still can’t stop talking.
7. Inviting Everyone.
Introverted husband says, “Let’s go out to dinner.” I almost always reply, “Oh yeah!! And let invite _____!” Everything is better if you invite everyone in the neighborhood to join in! That’s what I always say! “The more the merrier” was obviously a expression invited by an wonderful extrovert. Sometimes, however, my family does need quality time together.
8. The House Echoes My Social Life.
If I haven’t seen anyone all day, the house slips into chaos. If I have been out, but did not have any good conversation with anyone, it’s worse. If I went out and had a great conversation with anyone, my spirits are lifted and it’s like someone injected coffee in my veins. Too bad it’s hard to have a half way decent conversation with three kids under 4.
9. I Need to Talk About it.
Motherhood can be a pretty lonely job. Talking on the phone is an absolute disaster most of the time. When my hubby gets home, half the time we fall asleep at the same time as the kids. BUT. When something halfway big happens in my life, I NEED to get it out! Sometimes that means calling Josh at work, calling my family back home, or telling my mom friends the same story over and over again. You’ve already heard this, ya say? Oh. Well, let me tell you again.
It just so happens the 2 of the kids are also extroverted. (The baby is still pending.) My poor husband. When we go out it is like a circus between the 3 of us. We are loud and express our emotions boisterously. Last week we decided to try out a restaurant near by. It was Friday night and the place was PACKED. Our waiter was the best. He was very talkative and sweet with the kids; plus he laughed at all my dramatic expressions. The kids are I started getting charged. The kids were coloring and August was showing Josh that he learned how to draw the letter ‘M’ in school. Josh explained that by adding the letter ‘O’ and another ‘M’ he spelling the word, ‘MOM’. He flipped out. I flipped out. Ellie (who had no idea what was going on) flipped out. There we were laughing, happy dancing, and I was singing “Goooood job Auggie!!”, when Josh’s smile turned into an embarrassed chuckle and he told us, “Guys. Quiet down a little. We are in public.” The fact of the matter is, I can’t help it! The kids pick up so much from me. Their indoor voices do not exists because my indoor voice does not exists.
Can you relate? Or does this sound bazaar? Let me know in the comments below!